Our vibrant, happy, floaty wrecking ball Phoebe left us suddenly today, and we are devastated.
Unlike a lot of our seniors, Phoebe has only been with us about a year. When we first met her at Presho auction, she was the last horse to be dropped off minutes before the loose sale started, skinny, sweaty, and breathing heavy. She stood in the back of her area, head down, defeated, and we knew immediately she was our highest priority to bring home. When she went through the ring they said she was an old 4H horse - and if you squinted just right, you could see it.
Once home, we found she was in her mid-20s, had vision impairment in both eyes, and a large tumor at her throatlatch. She was also breathing heavy, extremely high anxiety, and obviously struggling with all the changes in her life. If you know us, though, you know as long as it's not emergent we are willing to try to give any horse a good quality of life, a respite from their stress, and a little time so even if it's short, they get at least a few weeks of relaxation, pampering, and relief before saying goodbye.
And we really thought Phoebe would need to say goodbye before winter.
But, she didn't. As she settled in, had dentals, and was fed, she started to gain weight, and relax. Her former self started showing up, and it was easy to see that she probably cleaned up in the 4H ring, with her big floaty gates, and eye-catching looks.
And she earned her nickname - Wrecking Ball - as every night she would do a perfect hunter circle, build up some speed, and trot (or even canter) into her stall, never missing ... even as blind as she was. She wouldn't readily come up until Nina would step out and sing/scream "She came in like a wrecking baaaaall...." every night. I suspect tonight is going to be hard for Nina.
Phoebe never came off our watch list, and as fall approached we found ourselves discussing her and whether it was fair to send her through winter again. We commented often that she was so happy, content, stress free, and *healthy* ... though always on the edge of underweight ... that letting her go on a good day would be on ok decision, as we knew she could never leave us. She loved her home, and she very quickly became a favorite of both Nina and Tiffany.
Then the summer heat hit, and we've struggled all summer with her losing her appetite, sweating profusely, and just really struggling. These last few days have been brutal on her, even with extra attempts to keep her comfortable and cool. Last night, after the 115+ degree heat index and high humidity, we knew she was in serious trouble. She was weak in her front, lethargic, and uninterested in food and water. After our first round of cooling measures, she still had a body temp of 102.6. She seemed to stablize and perk up, and this morning she seemed to be ok, with her head right up in the front of the industrial fan, loving and friendly, and even had eaten a bit.
We kept her inside, however, to monitor her and be able to make rapid changes with the heat. Around 9:30 am, however, with little notice, she collapsed, and within 15 minutes she was gone. She didn't give the vet time to come out and help her cross the bridge, but just like she did every night, I imagine she saw that bridge, did her beautiful hunt circle ... and ran into heaven like a wrecking ball - probably hearing Nina singing for her as she went.
She may not have been with us long, but she made a huge impact. She was close with 37 year old Shanno and unfortunately, has been hanging out with Buddy who lost Nelly just a few weeks ago. Shanno accepted it gracefully, but Buddy was distraught. Prayers for all of her friends, please.
And when you hear the thunder tonight, smile for our Phoebe, it's just her running home.